take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Randomize
