Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize