apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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