I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
i now understand why vodka
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
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