I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
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