thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
i believe in u and ur pee
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