do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Randomize
