Do vagina's smell?
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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