sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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