Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
