doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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