i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
