butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
then he tried to convert me to islam
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Randomize
