I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
