just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
My penis needs a shock collar
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
My life is pants optional.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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