let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Randomize
