what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
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