I hate your face
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I believe in your delicious
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
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