Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Still dying that you shit outside
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Randomize
