Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Randomize
