Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Randomize
