Just fell off a train. Bad.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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