Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
