remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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