come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize
