??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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