She went from zero to smokin in five shots
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Randomize