He had one of those small greek statue penises
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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