there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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