Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
Randomize
