Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
