I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
