I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
