i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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