There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize
