and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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