"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
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