He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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