Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
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