You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
