..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
