I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I need to sanitize my soul.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
