please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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