he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
