hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
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