ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
vagina is talking i cant
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
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