No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
Randomize
