ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize