Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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