I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Randomize
